What is a 'sleep divorce', and could it actually improve not just your slumber, but your relationship with your partner? Here, relationship expert Gabriella Killeen speaks with three couples who all have different experiences of moving into separate bedrooms (or beds) and how it affected their sleep, sex life and intimacy
“Jeez, sleep divorce, that sounds a bit harsh? No wonder people are sceptical of the idea of sleeping apart, if that's what we're calling it now.”
This is the common response I get when discussing the concept of 'sleep divorce', i.e. not sharing a bed with your partner. With the 'whose partner snores the most' competition, the two-duvet vs one-duvet debate, and how to manage a good night’s sleep when one of you is a wiggler and the other sleeps like a vampire, it becomes clear that this is a very hot topic with strong and varying opinions.
Thinking back on more than a decade with my partner, and since we added a mini-person to the equation three years ago, things have really changed when it comes to sleep. I remember talking to my grandparents about the fact that, after turning 75, they slept in separate bedrooms. I thought it was insane. Me, a 20-year-old newly in love and convinced I knew everything about it, couldn’t fathom not wanting to share a bed with my partner every night. I thought the whole concept was pretty sad.